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MicroBlog 3: If your sentence starts with an ‘-ing’ word, don’t make this mistake!

Matthew Ward · 04/12/2020 · 2 Comments

Who doesn’t love an adrenaline-pumping chase sequence? From Mission Impossible and Jason Bourne, to Star Wars and Indiana Jones, there’s no shortage of grand pursuits to revel in. During last month’s NaNoWriMo, I particularly enjoyed writing a couple of chase sequences for my novel. I’d get caught up in the rapid drama ensuing in my imagination, darting across the page with my characters, and …

… unfortunately tumbling into a big grammar pitfall … several times.

Here’s an example of what I mean:

Rounding the corner, he sped down the next passageway.

In the heat of the moment, I’d forgotten that introductory phrases that start with an ‘-ing’ word—like ‘rounding the corner’—always express an action that occurs at the same time as the rest of the sentence. I’d accidentally said that my character was rounding the corner at precisely the same moment as he was speeding down the next passageway. That’s not even possible! It’s like the lady in the next sentence putting her shoes on while going to work.

Putting on her shoes, she headed out to catch the train.

I’m trying to imagine her now, hopping down the street, one shoe on, one shoe stubbornly refusing to slip over her heel.

Now, there are, of course, loads of legitimate times to use these introductory phrases that start with an ‘-ing’ word.

Standing on the doorstep, he rang the bell.

Pushing the covers back, she climbed out of bed.

Running to catch the bus, he felt his heart pounding furiously.

Those pairs of actions are all truly simultaneous, and that’s the key to avoiding this grammar pitfall. Ask yourself if your pairs of actions are truly simultaneous. If the answer is no, like it was with the sentences in the novel I’m writing, the solution can be as simple as adding ‘after’ to the start of the sentence.

After rounding the corner, he sped down the next passageway.

After putting on her shoes, she headed out to catch the train.

Another simple solution is reworking the sentence around ‘and’.

He rounded the corner and sped down the passageway.

She put on her shoes and headed out to catch the train.

But there are a myriad of ways those sentences could have been reworked. For me, the real task is noticing the problem, even when I’m absorbed in my most dramatic scenes.

Just remember:

Introductory phrases that start with an ‘-ing’ word always express an action that occurs at the same time as the rest of the sentence.

The following sentence is definitely correct: Rereading his blog post, Matthew checked for typos.

And the following is definitely not: Getting up from his desk, Matthew walked down the stairs.

And that’s it from me. Have a great week!

And for lots more grammar pointers, check out My Big Blog Directory.

But if you’d like some entertainment instead, take a look at Glimpses—my free book of short stories.

Filed Under: Grammar Blogs Tagged With: English grammar, grammar, phrases

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Comments

  1. Tim Eichenbrenner says

    04/12/2020 at 21:46

    Good points, Matthew.

    Reply
    • Matthew Ward says

      04/12/2020 at 22:31

      Thank you.

      Reply

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“What about milk?” Debbie asked. Mark reached for the milk. “Let me see.” He shook the carton. “There’s only a drop left.” “I’ll add it to the list.”

This paragraph includes several mistakes.

The paragraph starts with Debbie’s dialogue. Then, it moves to Mark’s. Then, it returns to Debbie’s. We need to start new paragraphs with each new speaker.

And we need to make sure that information about Debbie is alongside her dialogue, and information about Mark is placed alongside his dialogue.

When we put this into action we get this:

“What about milk?” Debbie asked.

Mark reached for the milk. “Let me see.” He shook the carton. “There’s only a drop left.”

“I’ll add it to the list.”

Now that’s perfect.

Mark, standing in the kitchen and hearing her call, opened the fridge. “I think,” Debbie continued, “we might be low on cheese.”

This paragraph includes a mistake. The dialogue in the paragraph is Debbie’s. Therefore, information that is primarily about Mark shouldn’t be in the same paragraph.

This is how it should be written:

Mark, standing in the kitchen and hearing her call, opened the fridge.

“I think,” Debbie continued, “we might be low on cheese.”

Mark moved one block of cheddar and checked behind it. “No, we’ve got two blocks.”

This paragraph is perfect. It involves Mark’s dialogue and information about Mark.

“Have we got enough groceries to last the week?” Debbie shouted from the living room.

This paragraph is perfect. It involves Debbie’s dialogue and information about Debbie.


There’s no need to wait for my next post because I’ve got an offer for you.
I’ll edit the punctuation and grammar in any two paragraphs of your writing for free.
You could choose the most awkward ones if you like!
(I’d probably do that if I were you.)
Then, when I return your paragraphs, I’ll include full explanations of every edit so that you can apply them to the rest of your writing. I’d love to help.
For more information and to take up my offer, click here.